Sometimes I feel like I should be only person in this world, the only person who should be given a chance to speak because I always find what others say to be a total insult to me. What makes you think you are so special that you know all solutions or some solutions to my problems? When did you even become me? Who told I need a solution to those problems? Maybe I feel okay having those problems, maybe I don’t feel okay having those problems but I don’t need a solution or if I may need a solution it will definitely not come from you. Or you are the so called Mr/Mrs Perfect?
Let me make myself crystal clear, my problems are not your problems and as a result don’t expect your problems to be mine too, cram that too. But I see you are not going to give up that easily, which is why am going to give you war, a war you’ve never seen or heard. Oh! You are laughing, you think this is funny? Maybe you don’t know, am not funny and am not trying to beat Kevin Hart out of his game.
You used to control me before, I always did what you commanded me to, I followed all your rules and they helped me a great deal, they helped me break some records and win some competitions. I enjoyed a lot, even right now as I’m typing this article am still using some of your rules. But am here to say “Not anymore, not all of them”.
Am not talking about my life problems, am talking about my grammatical problems. What the hell is wrong with this dictionary installed in my editor? It corrects almost every word I type. When I type my favorite slang, it’s already on my throat highlighting every bit of it in red. Where were you on Valentine’s Day? Why didn’t you come to me then and use that red ink you are wasting now and paint it on the rob I used to tie around the Valentine’s gift I bought for my girlfriend or that dress she wore.
Where were you when I was declared bankrupt of options by my other self? When I used a banana plant rob, when I wore a maroon T-Shirt thinking its red. Where were you? Even if science says men are color blind, I sensed something was wrong with my T-Shirt, either the color or I had worn it inside out. What irritates me even more is when I type ‘WiFi’ and it highlights it in red too. It wants me to use a hyphen huh? Who told you I care about the hyphen?
We are a WiFi generation, millennials. All we care about is getting what we want not giving you what you want. Wait, let me ask have you pronounced Wi-Fi together with that hyphen all in one? Definitely not. Now, I know I have made a big mistake beefing with the dictionary in my editor. But this is not a rap battle that can get me shot, am damn sure that it can’t do nothing to me even if I mess around with it though there are some ‘Majisifus Majimarefus’ in English who will start correcting me. Let me make myself clear once more, this is my laptop, the editor is in my laptop, the dictionary is in the editor which happens to be in my laptop. My house my rules, Period. Yoh dictionary go sue me, I also have lawyers, my fans.